Supporting others
How to support someone who always prioritises the needs of others first?
How to help them to transition into supporting themselves first so the can best support others?
There is a misconception that people who put others first are really doing so.
That is not actually the case. Every action they take is related to self survival. Giving to others so they are not taken from without choice.
That feels better for them than the other way around.
It is presented in the logical mind as self sacrifice, but in reality it is always self preservation.
Wow, I hadn’t thought of it that way.
So they really are tuned into focusing on themselves first.
Yes they are. Everyone generally is, that is the default for human beings.
Even when the saying goes “I’m taking one for the team” it is always with self intention in mind, as if self sacrifice places them with higher value in the eyes of others.
So now that you have given me this perspective on the situation, I feel less like I need to support someone else to look after their own needs first as that is actually what they are doing. Correct?
Yes, that is correct.
And, we want to remind you, it is not your role to focus on someone else’s wellbeing and how they interact with others.
Your primary goal is to focus on your own wellbeing.
If it makes you uncomfortable to continually watch someone else ‘self sacrifice’ then let go of that need to control their experience. They are inherently programmed for self survival and choose how they interact with others to that end goal.
What places you in a position of wanting to make judgement on how they decide go about their life experience?
Yes you may feel love and concern for them.
The need for you to want them to feel better so you feel better is back to front.
The ability to observe their experience and still feel good is the key to allowing your wellbeing to thrive and therefore supporting them energetically to find a different approach to their survival experience.
Trusting that they know what they need better than you believing you know what they need is key. They have all the skills they require within their own complete life experience toolkit, as you all do.
Focus on yourself as love ❤️